Who Will Call You a Fool?
Can I just say that it is such a privilege to sit under the teaching of God’s Word? I love it. Love it love it love it love it. Especially as one who teaches, I just find it such a huge honor to get to sit under someone else, knowing the sweat and toil and pain (and personal conviction!) that one goes through in preparing a message. I feel spoiled rotten getting to just sit and receive. Especially when it is the authoritative Word of God that’s preached. Amen!
Anyway, I got to do that twice this week and I am most grateful. Tuesday we studied James 3, and Joy taught about Earthly Wisdom vs. Heavenly Wisdom. It has stuck with me all week. I wasn’t sure exactly how to articulate it, or even quite what it was that God was teaching me, but it’s starting to become clearer now.
Then tonight, I got to sit under Joel’s teaching of Luke 12:13-21, the story of the rich fool. That, coupled with what I’d been stewing on all week, was enough to reduce me to a heap of glorious thankful convicted worshipping, in-awe-of-Jesus tears right there in the service. God’s Word is so good!
So here’s the gist of it: James 3:13-18 shows that earthly wisdom is characterized by jealousy and selfish ambition—and is described as earthly, unspiritual, and demonic. In other words, earthly wisdom seeks to promote self, above God and above others. Heavenly wisdom, on the other hand, is “first pure, then peacable, gentle, open to reason, full of mercy and good fruits, impartial and sincere.” In other words, the wisdom from God has a right motive, it promotes peace, it is gentle and willing to yield if it is confronted with God’s truth, is merciful with others and bears good fruit, and is impartial to others and authentic. It is wholly concerned with the glory of God and the good of others.
So all week long I have been asking God for heavenly wisdom. As we’ve been seeking Him with regards to Filling in My Blank: giving, finances, standard of living, selling our house, a heart for the world and for people, I’ve been SO incredibly challenged by how much the world’s wisdom and mind-set can still rule my thinking. Much financial scheming (and hoarding!) can be labeled “wisdom”, and yet what kind of wisdom is the key here. Both are labeled wisdom, but heavenly wisdom is something entirely different from the world. It is as upside-down as God’s Kingdom–where the first shall be last. In this case, then, it could be that heavenly wisdom could quite possibly appear foolish to the world. Do you follow? For the rich young ruler to sell all that he has and give to the poor so that he may have treasure in heaven would appear very financial un-wise to the world. To God, that’s the smartest investment he could possibly make. Do you see what I’m saying?
So all week long I’ve battled, because I feel like this new distinction between earthly and heavenly wisdom has made me question everything that I’ve always held as “wisdom.” For example, I’ve always held that it is wise for us to spend as much as possible on a house because of the tax laws that benefit clergy. Basically spending a lot on a house reduces our taxable income so we pay much less to the government. And yes, that is wise. But, wouldn’t it be even wiser just to give it all away to further God’s kingdom?! That would reduce taxable income as well! 🙂 So you see what I mean? I’m not saying one is right and one is wrong, I’m just saying that perhaps God’s heavenly wisdom looks different, perhaps way different, than even the wisest of earth’s financial advice. I’m still a Dave Ramsey enthusiast, but perhaps God’s financial advice would even be quirkier than Dave’s.
So suffice it to say I really struggled all week. Everything I’d held as “wise” was now under the scrutiny of… well, of God’s Word. And that’s good, I suppose, but it was a rather unsettling feeling. On top of all that were the challenging points Joy brought up about motive, our hearts, etc. I look in my heart and I find that it still has plenty of wickedness. I still want to look spiritual, I still want praise, I still want people to think I’m neat, I still want the approval of people. It still makes me crawl up in a ball when someone criticizes our decision. Ugh. Lord, change my heart and make me only concerned with what You think!
And tonight He did. At least for a beautiful hour and a half (can’t promise what tomorrow will hold!), He did. As Joel preached a powerful message about the Rich Fool from Luke 12, it was as if God opened my heart’s eyes to the amazing splendor of Himself, and all of a sudden it didn’t matter one iota how ugly those inexpensive houses were. God is beautiful enough to make up for any lack my home might have. Besides, He adorns the humble with salvation (Psalm 149:4), He can certainly adorn whatever humble house I have into a sanctuary of grace and beauty. Isn’t that what He does with our lives?!
And here’s the thing Joel said that about made me about fall out of my chair, in light of my week’s prayers and meditation. He talked about how the rich fool had acquired great great wealth for himself, so much that he needed to tear down his barns and build bigger barns. Now, get this: The world (and most Christians) would say, “There’s a wise guy. That‘s the guy I should ask for financial wisdom from. He obviously is making all the wise decisions because God has blessed him so much.” We would praise such a man, call him a genius financial advisor. But you know what God calls Him? A fool. (v. 20 But God said to him, ‘Fool!)
Fool.
Friends, that single word brings tears to my eyes. I plead with you to hear my heart in this. God called him a fool. Why? Because he “laid up treasures for himself and was not rich toward God.” A fool.
He is no fool who gives what he cannot keep to gain what he cannot lose. (Jim Elliott)
Worldly wisdom and earthly wisdom. Let me put it this way:
You and I are going to be called a fool by someone.
We can live by God’s economy, give more than we make, refuse the empty promises of materialism and wealth, and store up treasures in heaven. If we do this: The world will call us fools.
Or, we can save, hoard, aim for bigger and better, pad ourselves with insulated walls of wealth. The world will praise us for our financial savvy, the world will call us wise. But, someday God will call us fools.
Who, dear friends, will call you a fool?
I am shaken and challenged to the core. I’ll tell you straight up I do not like the unsettling feeling of re-thinking every piece of wisdom I’ve held so dear. All week long it has troubled me. But, I’m thankful. I’m thankful beyond words for God’s true Word that does not change. I’m thankful to have the privilege of sitting under two phenomenal teachers this week and receiving God’s Word with meekness. Though I don’t know where this is leading, I know one thing for sure: I do not want God to call me a fool.
Let’s desperately seek His ways and His wisdom. Father, lead us in your truth. We trust in You. Amen.
Leading My Heart
Signing the Seller Disclosure form and spreading a yard of fresh barkdust was the easy part. It’s been 3 weeks since we put our house on the market. Of course we received an offer after 2 days, and I jumped around like a crazy woman, ecstatic out of my mind, but then the offer was withdrawn, and it’s been quiet every since. Quiet enough to give me time to think, and give God time to whisper in His lovely convicting way.
So the initial decision was actually quite easy. One day I was sorting through my thoughts and trying to figure out how to articulate how happy this decision has made me—that it’s not a sacrifice, not as though we’re sad or selfless—we want to do this. And I kept thinking, It’s as if I found this secret treasure that I hadn’t known about, and I want to sell everything that I can in order to invest in this secret treasure! So I was weaving this story in my mind, and trying to think of how to articulate it to people, then I realized that that story had been told before… in Matthew 13:44 🙂 “The kingdom of heaven is like treasure hidden in a field. When a man found it, he hid it again, and then in his joy went and sold all he had and bought that field.” I can totally understand how that man felt—heart racing, trying to hurriedly sell everything he had because he’d discovered something so much more valuable! Overjoyed at the opportunity!!
But (just putting myself in his shoes here), what if he couldn’t get everything sold quickly? Or what if he couldn’t scrape together enough money to buy that field, with the hidden treasure in it, right away. What if he had to save up for a while? What I’m getting at is this: What if he had to persevere in his decision?
Because I think that is where we live. In the past few weeks, since taking the plunge and giving away 41% of our income, we’ve had some amazing opportunities to give in ways that we never would have before. I’ve had a chance to be involved in situations that made me so happy that tears filled my eyes. This, this new freedom in giving is not a sacrifice, it’s a joy.
But not every day is like that. When we persevere in giving, there are days, plenty of them even in the last 3 weeks, that I look at what I’m “missing” instead of what I’m gaining. It is so easy for my eyes to slip and the result is that my joy slips as well.
For example, we started looking for houses, here in West Linn, in our new desired price-range, which would enable us to be debt free in 7 years. IF that worked out, we could conceivably be able to give 82% of our income away down the road! How crazy is that?! Yes! Now only God knows the future, I have no idea if that is what He has in store, but how fun to dream of ways to lay up treasures in heaven! What a great return on our money!
But actually looking at these houses is another story. How shall I put it nicely? They are not pretty. They are, well—they are ugly. They all have roofs and indoor plumbing. Some even have big huge lots with beautiful trees. A few have plenty of space for family and community group gatherings. A couple even have spare bedrooms! But, alas, they are ugly.
And I am a woman. And I like beauty. So as I look at many of these houses, my mind is already going to the new appliances I would buy, the way I would fix things up, etc. Now none of that is wrong, certainly not wrong. As women we should be the homemakers and create homes that are havens of beauty and order, peace and tranquility. But what I’m saying is that even as I sell my home and seek to invest my treasure in eternal things, my default is still to seek to make this life as comfortable and beautiful and rich as possible. My eyes, for the most part, are still on me.
At the conference this past weekend, I heard a gal share about her family’s adventure of moving to Papua New Guinea this summer to serve as long-term missionaries there. She was refreshingly candid and honest as she shared that even though she’s going to an unreached people group, she still battles the same struggles and sin in her heart that we do. “Am I hoping people will think I’m really spiritual? Am I trying to make a name for myself? Am I griping and complaining about the process or the struggles or the wait or the expense or the inconvenience?” Just because she lives in a grass hut somewhere doesn’t mean her heart is any more pure than ours. Right?
Right. And just because I might sell my brand new fancy house and move into an old tiny house doesn’t mean that I’m any less attached to the things of this world. I certainly hope God does a work in my heart, as He has been, and gradually helps me to let go, to see with His eyes, to weep for the lost, to actually care. But it will take a lot more than a For Sale sign in my yard for Him to do that.
Oh, friends, God wants our hearts. A good step, a very good first step, is to lead our hearts by putting our money where we want our hearts to go. We cannot physically put our hearts in the right place, but God gives us the secret that “where your treasure is, there your heart will be also” (Matthew 6:21). If I want my heart to be fixed and focused on God, his Kingdom, His work, and eternal glory in His presence, I can at least lead my heart in the right direction by putting as much treasure as possible toward that end. What I’m finding, is that as I lead my heart, I find how stubborn it is. I don’t realize how stubborn my heart is until I try to tell it what to do. Then it rears its ugly head. It’s not that it’s any more evil than it ever was, it’s just that now I’m telling it what to do and it’s mad. So, I suppose, we have to persevere in leading our hearts. Why?
Because it doesn’t happen overnight. A sign in our yard certainly did not make my heart magically free of filth. But, it was a step of faith, a step of leading my heart. And, like many decisions, the hard part isn’t the initial decision it’s the daily following through of that decision. I glanced at our bank account and noticed it was shrunken—I didn’t like that. I had to have the house ready to show during a hectic time of getting out the door to the conference last weekend—I didn’t like that. I looked at inexpensive houses and saw that they were all ugly—I didn’t like that. There are plenty of things I don’t like, but I think it’s those times that we get in God’s word and remind our hearts of that buried treasure. That must have been what the man from Matthew 13 did. While he was off trying to sell everything, trying to get it all together so he could buy that field with the treasure in it. Perhaps there were days he got discouraged? Perhaps there were days he wondered if he’d dreamed the whole thing up… perhaps there wasn’t really treasure there anyway. Perhaps there were days he thought the whole thing was just too much hassle…forget it. But I bet he walked past that treasure every day, just to remind Himself that it was all worth it. I bet he never let that treasure leave his mind—he cherished the thought of it so that he’d be able to persevere and purchase that precious piece of land.
So I guess that’s what we do as well. We lead our hearts. And then we persevere in leading our hearts. We keep walking by that treasure by opening up God’s word each and every day. We keep thinking of that treasure by opening our hearts to stories of those in need. We remind ourselves of that treasure so that we won’t forget to lead our hearts each and every day.
How much my flesh would just like a quick easy process! But God knows the best and loving way to reveal those crevices of my heart, those filthy places that need so badly to be cleaned. God, please show us how to lead our hearts, and how to persevere in leading them too. You alone can change us. Help us to respond.
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Need a way to remind your heart? Just read this great blog post. Wow: http://kissesfromkatie.blogspot.com/2010/09/for-with-much-wisdom-comes-much-sorrow.html
Moments as a Ministry Mommy
This weekend I’m so blessed to have the opportunity to teach at the Oregon Women of the Word conference down in Medford, Oregon. This week was, let’s just say, hectic, preparing amidst some other things. But this little moment showed me how God can use even the chaos to demonstrate His love:
Thursday was crazy. We had an extended-family crisis that threw many things up in the air. I was cleaning the house and making meals for the kids while I’d be gone, and I needed to work on my notes for the conference. In particular, I needed to shorten one message, and was praying about what to cut out, as I had one certain part in mind that I was debating about whether it fit. After I finally finished the dishes I turned around to find that Heidi had discovered my bright red marker and taken to scribbling all over my notes. ARGH! I went over, picked them up, to discover that she had scribbled into oblivion the entire section that I was praying about whether or not to cut out. I couldn’t even read it.
I had to smile. Guess that answers that prayer!
Moments as a Ministry Mommy. 🙂
Frugal Fridays: Helpful Jumpstart for Food Stamp Challenge
So can I just say that I’m thrilled at how many of you are gung-ho to start the Food Stamp challenge–whole, organic, healthy, seasonal food for our families for about $2/day/person, or less. So here are what I think are a few key jumpstart tips.
1. Simplify. Remember, eating healthy is not expensive. Snacks and Convenience are expensive. If there is any way to simmer down your grocery list to as few items as possible, you are well on your way. Here is a sample of my grocery shopping this month. All I’ll need as the month goes on is some more fresh fruits and veggies, but this is the bulk of it:
- Winco (for the month): In Bulk: Oats, whole wheat flour, brown rice, black beans, pinto beans, lentils, garbanzo beans, almonds, whole-wheat pastas, brown sugar, evaporated cane juice, barley, and raisins. Also: Coconut milk, yams and onions (don’t need to be organic). Oh, and a few fruit leather because Dutch was with me. Total: $50.57.
- Fred Meyer: 21 lbs. of organic fuji apples ($.78/lb this week!), bananas, Tillamook cheese ($3.99 this week w/ coupon!), organic milk (on sale this week for 1/2 gal. for $2.30), cage-free eggs. Total: $28.31.
- Costco: 5 lbs. each of organic green beans, organic peas, organic corn, plus 5 Liters olive oil (which will last forever). Total $34. (Thanks Dani!)
- Albertson’s: I happened to have some good coupons so I snagged organic blue-corn tortilla chips, dish soap and laundry detergent all for $4.02.
- So that’s $116.90 so far, so I think we should be good. I have plenty of meat and peanut butter leftover from last month.
2. Bread for pennies: I was just talking to a friend last night about how expensive healthy bread is. Don’t buy it! It’s so easy to make. If you don’t have a bread machine you can buy one for $50 and it’ll pay for itself in a few months. (This book is also SO helpful, for making everything from hamburger buns (yum!) to pizza dough to cinnamon rolls.) Cook it in the oven, not the machine–so cheap and yummy! Easiest recipe one earth, foolproof:
- 5/8 c. milk
- 1/2 c. water
- 3 TB sugar
- 1 1/2 TB butter
- 1 1/2 tsp. salt
- Then on top–3 cups flour (any kind, I use whole wheat), then dig a little well in the top and put 2 tsp yeast (yeast is super cheap to buy in big containers at Costco). Do dough cycle, then dump it onto greased cookie sheet, bake at 350 for 25 minutes. Yum! For pennies per loaf.
3. Challenge yourself to go without. The Beans & Rice challenge really showed me how addicted to sugar I am. I missed eating sweet things! It was so helpful though because it kind of re-set my sweet tooth. For example today I was marveling at how peas are so sweet, they taste like candy! (Ok not quite). But I do think we can slowly wean ourselves off of things if we try. I still put sugar in my tea though… *sigh*
Happy grocery shopping! I’ve also heard that the Green Grocer in Oregon City has some great local, whole, organic foods. Haven’t checked it out yet, though. Send along your tips, ideas, recipes! And don’t forget to thank God for every bite!