Let the Blogging Begin
Yesterday was a day that’s been circled on my calendar for months. The last day of teaching women’s Bible study, in fact the last day of Bible study for the year. We’ve been journeying through 1 Peter, and it has been wonderful, challenging, intense, rewarding, thrilling. But it’s also kept me from doing, well, pretty much anything else. For me, when I’m teaching it’s like I’m in the middle of finals week in school. Even when you’re “done” preparing and studying, you still feel like you can’t really do anything else because you’re afraid all that stuff you’ve studied will somehow slide out of your brain. So though you can’t sit around and study anymore, you’re not really free to do anything else whatsoever. That’s me for pretty much 3 months, or at least the weeks I taught.
So anyway, yesterday I came home and celebrated my newfound freedom by… doing our taxes. Oddly enough I actually was excited to do it, just something other than reading 1 Peter! 🙂
I also finally allowed my brain the mental space to start reading another book. This morning I began So Long Insecurity, by Beth Moore. Oh wow. You’re gonna get a LOT of blog posts about this book because it is hitting a nerve with me. Who knew I was so insecure? I knew, from doing her studies, that I could already relate to Beth Moore on a lot of levels, and as she’s writing I find myself re-reading sentences thinking, “How’d she know that about me?!” So more to come there.
We’re on day 4 of the Love Dare, with my friend. For those of you who’d like to follow along, here is the gist of days 1-4:
Day 1: Refuse to say anything negative to your spouse all day long.
Day 2: Now, continue with saying nothing negative, and do one nice, thoughtful act for your spouse.
Day 3: Buy something for your spouse, to show that you thinking of them during your day.
Day 4: Call or contact your spouse during their workday, for no other reason than to see how they are doing.
So at this point Jeff hasn’t been able to tell that I’m actually doing the Love Dare. 🙂 Hopefully that indicates that our marriage is good, not that my Love Dare actions are lousy (probably a bit of both). At any rate, if you want to follow along, just write them down and start your 40 days whenever you like.
Next up I’ll post some thoughts from 1 Peter. For now, the kids are up and the day needs to begin. But I’m excited to have some mental space to do some more writing. Beware, the posts are coming!
The Influential Woman
I was up early this morning. My eyes popped open, as if I’d just blinked last night instead of slept, and thoughts still full of last night’s message. Last night was our March Adorn, our monthly time for women of our church to get together, hear a speaker, enjoy some treats, and get to know each other. We set up the room in 14 little “living rooms”, 6 people in each, with couches, chairs, lamps, candles, flowers, and harp music in the background. People must have been praying because from the moment women began to arrive, it seemed that God’s Spirit was just on our time in a special way.
The topic was The Influential Woman. Becky Doel, a seasoned, wise woman of God, spoke, and I felt like a sponge, on the edge of my seat, wishing I could somehow physically take her words and tuck them into my heart and soul, make them my own, make them work in me that things God’s done in her.
Her words were simple. She’s the first to announce her influence comes not from degrees or prestigious job titles. She is “only” a wife and mother. She’s homeschooled her children, loved her husband, and biblically influenced the women around her. She has embodied Titus 2:
“Older women likewise are to be reverence in behavior, not slanderers or slaves to much wine. They are to teach what is good, and so train the young women to love their husbands and children, to be self-controlled, pure, working at home, kind, and submissive to their own husbands, that the word of God may not be reviled… so that in everything they may adorn the doctrine of God our Savior.”
Women, this is our job description. All of us. I think so often I make influence, mentoring, discipling, whatever you choose to call it, too complicated. One thing I loved was that Becky thinks there is an “older woman” and a “younger woman” in all of us. We can all learn from each other. But those with the life experience of walking with Christ need to share with the younger women around, teaching them. And what are they to teach them? How to love their husbands and children, how to be self-controlled and pure, how to work at home and put their time and attention there, how to be kind, how to submissive to their own husbands. So that God’s Word would not only not be reviled, but that it would be adorned, adorned by our beautiful lives, made attractive to the world by our pure conduct and by our love. Women, that’s what we’re called to do.
As a young woman, I can vouch for the fact that we younger women are hungry, starving for godly mentors. I wanted to climb into Becky’s purse and have her take me home so I could learn everything she had to offer. Older women, please know we want to learn from you. Becky admitted she feels insecure, especially around some of us younger women who are educated, “accomplished”, confident in speaking, etc. She feels like she’s not sure of what she has to offer. Hogwash! Good grief, older ladies, you have so much to offer. Those of us who have been married 7 years want to hear from you who have been married 37 years. Those of us with 3-year-olds want to hear from you with 30-year-olds. My mom knows this, she is (as a wise mother/mother-in-law should be) always cautious of giving advice, so I usually have to beg her to give me wisdom, twist her arm to tell me what I should do! 🙂 As I write that though, I realize that is one of the things that makes her so attractive. We’ve all been around women who are so eager to tell you their advice (I can be one of these obnoxious sorts), you leave wanting to do exactly the opposite of what they said. God’s influential women listen, support, care, empathize… and share the godly wisdom and counsel that God has laid on their hearts.
I for one am praying and pleading with God to raise up the older generation of women to be pillars of wisdom and beauty in God’s house, strengthening the younger women, encouraging, exhorting, praying for, believing in. Though it’s always been a passion of mine to be an influential woman, I was so inspired last night to, Lord willing, help empower those older influential women around me. We’re calling you, we love you, and we need you.
Please share with us. Please reach out to us. We’re listening.
If we knew He was listening…
If we knew He was listening, I wonder how it would change our lives.
I’m so excited tonight and tomorrow to teach 1 Peter 3:8-22. One of the tiny little nuggets tucked into this passage is a quote from Psalm 34:12-16. Peter writes (v.12) “For the eyes of the Lord are on the righteous, and his ears are open to their prayer.” It could also be translated “attentive” to their prayer. The first week of our “letter lessons” we taught Dutch the word “attentive” in order to learn the letter A. He learned that Attentive means Look, listen, and respond (3-year-old definition). That is exactly what this passage tells us about God. He is not only listening to us, He’s looking at us. He’s watching us, with open ears, attentive to our prayers. Do we believe this?
I remember the very first day of my Prayer class at Multnomah, our professor chose two volunteers to tell about their Christmas break. The first was a shy, quiet, timid girl. Our professor pulled up a stool, sat down across from her, looked her in the eye, leaned toward her, and listened. She began slowly, and he nodded as she spoke, use verbal listening cues, laughed at the funny parts, smiled, eyes on her constantly, intently listening. She went on and on, her face flushed at the joy of really being listened to. When she was done she beamed.
Next he picked Jeff (who he knew could handle some abuse :). Jeff began and immediately the professor got up and went and looked at his teaching notes, completely turning his back on Jeff. He rustled through some papers, cleared his throat, looked at Jeff impatiently, looked at his watch, fidgeted, glanced up at the clock. Jeff tried to persevere (since he knew what he was doing), but eventually he couldn’t take it any more. “I quit,” Jeff finally resigned, “you’re not even listening.”
I think we’ve all been in that awkward and kind of embarassing situation (or maybe it’s just me!) when we’re talking in a group and somehow everyone gets distracted doing something and next thing you know you’re telling a story to no one. Unless you’re really determined, you usually just quit talking, right? I mean, what’s the point if no one’s listening?
My professor’s point was that many of us don’t really believe that God is listening. We might say that we do, but we don’t really operate under that conviction. Many of us feel like God is like that professor who’s checking the clock, fidgeting. As if we have to shout and beg for Him to listen. Why would we want to pray if we view God like that?
Meditating on this verse this week has impacted me immensely. This morning we had our first every Morning Prayer, from 6-7am at church. It was awesome. Just 5 of us, gathered together in the early morning light, confident that “the eyes of the Lord are on the righteous, and his ears are open to their prayer.” I realized this morning that God was waiting for us. He was up long before we were (since He never sleeps!), and He was bent, stooped over, with His ear down to us, waiting for us just to mutter a word to Him, waiting for us to lift up our voices, praise, confession, thanks, and requests to Him. How this changes the way we pray! When I realize God is just waiting for me to speak, to pray, to ask, it changes everything. It was a joy this morning to sit with Him, knowing He was waiting for us all along.
If we knew God was listening, I wonder how much more we might pray. I wonder what we might ask. I wonder what we might dare mention to Him. I wonder how we might pour out our hearts to Him, knowing He was sitting there, eyes on us, soaking up every word. Thank you, Lord that Your ears are open to us. Show us how to pray.
Letter Lessons
This may interest next to none of you, but I’m posting it for my own accountability!
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I didn’t think I”d have to make the homeschool-or-not decision until much farther down the road, but it seems that nowadays the second a kid turns three they head to preschool. I certainly won’t make any decisions about what’s right for other kids, but at this point we’re not sending Dutch to preschool, mostly because I need all the time I can to shape that crazy wicked heart of his.
So I recently red this Revolutionary Parenting book, and Jeff and I spent time in Texas talking through our plan for this next year, for Dutch. If he’s not in preschool I figured I better figure out what he’s supposed to be learning! And it seems fairly unanimous, among Christian educators (and my mom who owns the subject), that the way to go is teaching character primarily, with other skills as secondary. Basically, use character lessons in order to teach math, reading, science, etc. That makes sense to me, since it doesn’t matter if Dutch can do algebra by age 5, if he’s lazy, dishonest, and rude he’ll still be sunk.
So, bear with me, this is kinda scary and vulnerable to share my idea. I’m one of those people who does best (perhaps it’s pride), teaching something that I developed myself. I have to own it to teach it. So I decided that to teach Dutch the alphabet, we would learn one letter each week, through a focus on a character trait. Jeff’s goal is to do a little mini Dinner Devotional–basically a 5 minute Bible story that relates to the character trait we’re learning. Then we’d reinforce manifestations of that character trait, reinforce the letters through things he’s interested in (they have Thomas the train engines for almost every letter of the alphabet), read verses about that trait, you get the idea.
So, our 26 character traits, specifically picked out because of Dutch’s unique–ahem–needs.
Attentive
Brave
Compassion
Discipline
Enthusiasm (not sure that he needs this one)
Forgiveness
Gentleness
Honesty
Integrity
Joyfulness
Kindness
Love
Meekness
Neatness
Obedience
Patience
Quick to respond
Respect
Servanthood
Thankfulness
Understanding
Valuing others
Wisdom
eXercise
Yielding
Zealous
So this week we’ve been doing Attentive, and it’s been kind of fun. He can now recognize the letter a, so that’s cool, and we’ve looked up online and found Thomas engines named Arrie, Alfie, Annie & Arthur. He knows that Attentive means, “See, listen, and respond.” Now, if we can only get him to do it! Jeff taught him the story of the little boy Samuel, who heard God’s voice and responded, “Speak for your servant listens.” He still dumped the bin of Legos on Heidi’s head this morning, however, so we have a ways to go. 🙂
I’d love to hear others/your ideas on teaching preschoolers character traits, as well as reading and math/counting skills. This is so new to me it feels like writing with my left hand, but I figure we have to start somewhere! And I figured if I posted this I’d be less likely to quit. So I’m off to be Attentive!