Sacred Mundane: The Blog

{Remembering this …}

I can see in my children’s eyes when I’ve mis-judged their actions. Just today I was in the kitchen and called Heidi in to me as I had heard her being rude to Dutch. She dawdled (was not obeying) and I thought I overheard Dutch say, “You’re getting a spank!” In my mind this was taunting her and if he rejoices over another’s discipline he gets to share in the same discipline. So I called him in as well.

As soon as I told him the charge I could see it in his eyes. Panic. Hurt. True, honest confusion and panic. His lip quivered.

“Mommy, I didn’t! I wasn’t! I was warning her that if she didn’t obey you she would get a spank! I was helping her!” And I know my boy and the look in his eyes–he was telling the truth. I apologized for mis-judging him and let him go. Surely there are plenty of occasions where his actions and motives are wrong, but this was not one.

The hurt in his eyes stuck with me because I’ve known that same feeling. We all have. I remember the Coffee Shop incident from Santa Clara, and the words, “Well, since your heart’s not in it…” I remember another scenario in the not-so-distance-past of having my motives misunderstood, what it’s like to have someone judge the condition of your heart and be painfully amiss. I start to feel physically sick even writing about it — it hurts.

And, sadly, I’m sure that I have misjudged others’ motives at times.

We’re such a fallen lot, aren’t we?

Those of us still limping through a people-pleasing addiction can find this misjudgment crippling.  But there’s someone inspiring who didn’t let it get him down at all. And we are wise to write our troubles in dust and our blessings in marble.

Instead of nursing the wound of misjudgment, let it slip off and move forward in courage.

Like David. 

Do you remember when Goliath defied the army of God? Do you remember how everyone was scared to death? Well David had been tending sheep but his dad, Jesse, had commanded him to take provisions for his brothers who were in the army camp. So he obeyed His father and did it. When he arrived, Goliath was breathing his threats, and David inquired  about who would fight him and what would be done for the man who did. And, it seems, as God was putting it in his heart to fight this battle, check out the encouragement he receives from his older brother, Eliab:

“And Eliab’s anger was kindled against David, and he said, ‘Why have you come down? And with whom have you left those few sheep in the wilderness? I know your presumption and the evil of our heart, for you have come down to see the battle.’” (1 Sam 17:28)

Ouch. Talk about mis-judged motives. David was simply obeying his father and then obeying his God.

But what does David do? Does he pout, all upset about being mis-judged? Nope. He does simply say, “What have I done?” and then…

“He turned away from him toward another…” (v. 29)

He just turned away. He let it go. He turned to someone else. He knew that THAT was not the battle to fight.

There were bigger battles to fight.

Too often, sweet friends, we (I) can get so hurt and bent out of shape over the Eliab-remarks and we forget the fact that there’s a way bigger battle going on. The battle for souls, for the gospel, for lives. Will we stay distracted and wounded by the misjudgment or will we move on to pursue the Kingdom of God?

Can you hear my heart? It does hurt to be misjudged, but we can move on to greater things. Remember what the real battle is.

By God’s grace, victory can be ours. 

A man’s wisdom gives him patience; it is to his glory to overlook an offense. Proverbs 19:11

{Praying for the grace and wisdom to overlook an offense today. Thank you so much for reading!}

• Sledding for Nana’s bday!
• Dutch so brave, hiking up that big hill and sledding down face-first.

• Heidi’s one way-too-fast ride … that was enough for the day.
• Snowball fights.

• Sunny skies.
• Spending our Saturday at the NW Reptile Expo. Because I love my boy.
• Seeing other friends who love theirs too. 🙂
• Petting the pythons.
• Hot tea.
• Green beans.
• Roasted yams.
• Jeremy’s homemade dark-chocolate coconut-milk ice cream. Whoa.
• Debra in her bday crown.
• The kids so eager to celebrate.
• Kissing my kids. Over and over and over. I can’t get enough of those 2!
• Reading 7 cover-to-cover, laughing out loud.
• My first zumba experience!
• Prioritizing.
• A clean kitchen.
• Peanut butter and homemade bread.
• Resting.
• Ashley.
• Expanding horizons.
• Narrowing focus.
• Leaning hard on Him.
• Trusting.
• His Word, never changing, always hope-giving.
• Hot tea, candles, boot socks, quilts. These are a few of my favorite things.

Have a fabulous weekend. Thanks for reading.

It was that dark winter, living with my parents, fighting to find joy. Dutch was a crying baby. I had no car or cell service. Everyday it rained. Flipping through my seminary catalog, I circled which classes I was slated to take next. The short title of one stood out: Prayer. I took a deep breath. Forget the rigor of Advanced Hermeneutics, this class would be tough.

Our first assignment was simple: Describe your present prayer-life. There was nothing to do but admit the truth. After being a Christian twenty years and having consistent quiet times for nearly ten, I confessed the overwhelming feeling in my heart and began the assignment like this:

“Honestly … I am a beginner.”

There, I’d said it. After finishing the writing assignment, I pulled out our text, checking the syllabus which pages had been assigned. Flipping to the correct spot, my eyes immediately fell to this same familiar word. Tears welled up as His kindness was clear:

One cannot begin to face the real difficulties of the life of prayer and meditation unless one is perfectly content to be a beginner and really experience oneself as one who knows little or nothing, and has a desperate need to learn the bare rudiments. Those who think they “know” from the beginning never, in fact, come to know anything … We do not want to be beginners. But let us be convinced of the fact that we will never be anything else but beginners, all of our life.¹

If you feel in over your head, Congratulations! If you feel like a beginner today, Rejoice! This is a gift. Your utter desperation “to learn the bare rudiments” places you smack dab in the richest soil of all. You are bound to grow. The truth is, we’re all beginners. So if you are blessed enough to know it, rejoice. Yes, you are a beginner. We’re all beginners. We must be.

But this truth cuts straight across the grain of our culture, doesn’t it?

Me, a beginner? As a nation we recoil from the notion. In our world, Knowledge is Power and Power is our god, so Information is the idol to which we bow. Admitting ignorance is avoided at all cost. So with pride and fear nipping at our heels, we’re driven on toward the appearance of expertise, as Tozer says, living “in secret fear that some day [we] will be careless and by chance an enemy or friend will be allowed to peep into [our] poor, empty souls. So [we] are never relaxed.”

“And to the victims of the gnawing disease Jesus says, ‘You must become like little children.’”²

In other words, You must be a beginner.

When Jesus came to earth, He passed over the religious experts and revealed Himself to the lowly in heart. The lost. The prostitutes and tax collectors.

We cannot learn until we admit, we need to. We cannot grow until we confess that we must. “Anyone who claims to know all the answers doesn’t really know very much” (1 Corinthians 8:2).

If, today, you are convinced you are a beginner, rejoice and thank God for His grace. And if you suspect, deep down, you are perhaps the expert, then ask God, by His gentle grace, to remind you you’re not. *smile* Thanks for reading.

Last week we talked about Rachel and Leah and their miserable procreation competition to win their husband’s love and favor.  We talked about how we, as women, can fall prey to the same sin–that of competing with one another instead of loving, supporting, preferring, and loving one another.  The crux of the issue for Rachel and Leah was trying to win the limited affection of one man–never a good idea.

In Genesis 37 we see that the apples don’t fall far from the trees.

You’re probably familiar with the story–Joseph is the favorite son of Jacob (because was the son of Jacob’s old age and of his favorite wife Rachel, and Jacob was the favorite son of his mom, funny how that happens) and because of this of course he receives preferential treatment from his dad.

Once again we see multiple people vying for the affection and favor of one man–and interestingly enough, it is the same man: Jacob.  What a dude. If you EVER are feeling discouraged about how God could ever use you for His glory because you’re not worthy–just take a quick coffee break and crack open your Bible to Genesis and get a glimpse of Jacob.  Heel-catcher, deceiver, supplanter, kind of a stinky father, probably not a super duper husband (although when you have kids with 4 women and they all live in the same tent you don’t have a fighting chance at success). Although, God used Him. And God is the faithful one.

Anyway, all I wanted to point out here, was verse 4:

“When Joseph’s brothers saw that their father loved him more than all his brothers, they hated him.”

Hated him.   Now later on he foolishly shares his dream with them and make them hate him even more, but before he even does anything foolish, they still hate him. Why? Simply because he had more of his father’s love.

Now there are a dozen lessons here, not the least of which is the importance of not treating our children preferentially! But just a quick note at how dangerous envy is.

Envy.

All they wanted was the preferential treatment, the love, the favor of their father. And while it is natural that they would feel envy toward their brother Joseph, it is still sin.  Envy is so dangerous because, as we see here, it leads to hate.

When we find envy in our hearts, hate is not far behind. That’s sobering, yes?  We’d never say we hated someone, but the seeds of hatred are envy. Are there seeds of hate in our hearts?

Moreover, this story reveals that when envy is planted, hate grows, and when it is fully grown it leads to murder.  Joseph’s brothers’ envy led them to such hatred that they planned on killing their own brother.

Sounds like Cain. Envy was what led him to murder his own brother.  Rachel and Leah didn’t physically murder each other, but I bet they wanted to! And while envy didn’t kill them physically, it clearly killed all love and affection they once shared. It killed a precious relationship.

Jesus echoed this as well. In Matthew 5:21-22 he says,

²¹ “You have heard that it was said to those of old, ‘You shall not murder, and whoever murders will be in danger of the judgment.’²² But I say to you that whoever is angry with his brother without a cause shall be in danger of the judgment.”

In essence Jesus is saying, it’s not just the end-result that is wrong, the seeds in our hearts are what is wrong.  Murder is the result of hate which is the result of envy.  We tend to treat envy pretty lightly. We joke about a little harmless schadenfreude or wish someone would be taken down a notch. But the root of that is envy, pure and simple. Envy leads to hatred, leads to murder.

Girls, all my fingers are pointed at myself here. We have to be on guard against the sin of envy, no matter how small. No matter what she has that you don’t have or how smart or funny or successful or rich or loved or whatever, we have to be on guard. Someone else’s “success” does not imply our failure. Oh to be on guard against our competitive hearts!  How thankful we can be that we don’t to fight for the love of our God.

It’s worth repeating: God has plenty of love to go around. There is no limited amount for us to fight over, like Rachel and Leah and all of their sons.  And if God’s affection is more than enough, we can rest secure. Amen?

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In what areas are you susceptible to becoming envious of others?  What steps can you take to root yourself in God’s Word and guard your mind against the sin of envy? Thanks for enduring these heavy words this week, and thanks for reading.