Sacred Mundane: The Blog

I will never cease to be amazed at how God orchestrates our lives so profoundly so that every little thing corresponds to what He’s teaching us. After contemplating competition all week, and after writing the LiveDifferent Challenge (read first), Jeff had an assignment he had to do prior to his Communications class, he had to watch a movie off a list of certain movies and do an exercise following. Well we will be busy Saturday and Sunday nights and his class starts on Monday…so even though I was falling asleep at 7pm and begging to just fall asleep when Dutch went to bed, it is now 11pm and guess what I’m doing? I’m writing because I have to…because I watched Cinderella Man. Wow. Could any movie better address these issues?! (I suggest renting it, but know that the boxing is brutal, so be ready to close your eyes)

Set in the Great Depression, I was brought to tears before the boxing even began. Realizing what people suffered through, and do continue to suffer through, always puts things in perspective. Oh Father, please help our hearts not be calloused to the suffering around us. As a Thinker who hates to cry, it’s easy to insulate myself from such suffering…I don’t like to bleed, but I’m asking God to make my heart bleed for people.

But the part that applies to our ongoing discussion about competition is this: James Braddock first fights for fun and for fame. Then the Crash happens, and four years into the Great Depression, he breaks his hand, he’s lost the electricity, and his family is in danger. So, he goes to work, doing grueling back-breaking labor with a broken hand. Later, when he has a rare chance to be let back in the ring, Braddock is a new man. He fights like a new man–with a passion and zeal that is new. Where before he had no “left”, he now can now dominate with a left hook. His trainer asks him what the difference is, he simply says, “On the docks I had to use my left hand.” On the docks. In the lowest point, the deepest suffering, when he was forced to work this labor to get milk for the kids, he developed the strength that turned around his career. How’s that for life application?! Oh Lord, give us that perspective!

But the real deal is this: When Braddock gets back in shape and begins to fight again, he’s in a press conference and a reporter asks him, “So why are you so much better now? What are you fighting for?” Braddock looks him in the eye and says, “Milk. I fight for milk.” Braddock knew what it was like to watch his children go hungry, and during the points in the fighting when he almost blacks out, he sees visions of his children, huddled in their home with no electricity. He visits “Hooverville”, where thousands of homeless people congregated in Central Park, NYC. He sees death, violence, panic, poverty, hunger. He fights for them. He fights to give them hope.

So I bring this all in because here is an example of a man fighting for good. For the survival of his children. I would say that for us, 9 times out of 10 our competition is probably prideful. We want to be the best, get the prize, win the argument. That, I maintain, is fleshly. But I’m adding the Part 2 to the LiveDifferent Challenge because “Be a Loser”, though an important part of the LiveDifferent equation, is only one half. Don’t just be a loser, be a loser to self, then fight with every ounce of your being for what is right. FIght for your marriage–Braddock’s wife’s commitment to him is an entire blog entry in itself so I’ll save it. Fight for your kids. Fight for justice. Fight for the unborn. Fight for the gospel. Not in an unchanneled, meaningless, vengeful sort of way, but in a faith-filled response to God’s Grace. Ask God what your cause is, even if it’s just something small like overcoming a bad habit in your life. Whatever it is, fight for it. Compete for it. Compete for something bigger than yourself. Even if it’s only milk.

So, yes, I am still on my “Is Competition Godly” kick? The one thing I love is that it certainly sparks discussion! Wow! People have opinions about this one! In fact, I posted the question on Facebook and was amazed when an awesome pastor friend of ours told me that this was the very topic of his Master’s Thesis in seminary! I guess it really matters!

Also, thank you to those of you who commented…I love that! I love getting feedback and hearing your thoughts. My sister-in-law is “foruming” on her blog right now and I love it because it’s so good to hear things from other people’s perspectives. But…it’s very rare to be able to dialog about things without getting…you guessed it(!)…competitive. I think that’s why it’s hard to discuss ideas without getting fired up because we have this gnawing thing inside us that doesn’t want to be wrong. Ugh! In fact, I had written a comment on her blog and then someone else kind of pointed out that my reasoning wasn’t so good (and she was right!). In my little heart, guess what? I got defensive inside! 🙂 I realized, Whoa Kari, you have a competitive little heart! So I stepped away from it and prayed and was then able to think clearly and not be so petty and then could go back in and discuss more with the goal of understanding more than being understood or of being right. It’s tricky, but what it reminded me was that first and foremost, if we’re going to discuss whether competition is godly, we must first acknowledge that we are all competitive. We all have this gnawing desire to be right. And I can guarantee you that that is nothing more than our selfish flesh. Some of this competition stuff is a no-brainer: The gnawing desire to always be right is pride. Pride = sin.

So, this is my best understanding of competition. Three Types of Competition: Selfish, Godly, and Neutral.

Selfish Competition is the opposite of Love: 1 Corinthians 13 tells us what love is. I LOVE the version in the Message (click to read it). Competition for the sake of self is the opposite of this. For example, Competition loves self more than others because it wants to win, Competition wants what it doesn’t have (lust for winning), Competition struts (watch the NBA), Competition has a swelled head (trash talking), Competition is “me first”, Competition keeps score, Competition revels when others grovel, Competition isn’t concerned for truth as much as concerned for self, Competition doesn’t put up with losing, Competition looks for faults in others, Competition nurses wounds over past losses. Competition is an unholy preoccupation with self.

Godly Competition is a wrestling against the forces of evil for the sake of Truth, Righteousness, Justice, Peace, etc.: So this morning as I was thinking and praying about this and this verse came to mind: Ephesians 6:12 For we do not wrestle against flesh and blood, but against principalities, against powers, against the rulers of the darkness of this age, against spiritual hosts of wickedness in the heavenly places. Wrestling is warfare (and the context of this verse). Warfare is nothing more than competition! We are called to competition. We are called to compete, viciously, passionately, for the sake of truth, love, righteousness, justice. So when I see injustice, I am called to compete for justice. When I see sin, I am called to compete for righteousness. The goal is never self, the goal is to always be for the Kingdom of God to be furthered through the spread of the gospel, the proclamation of Truth, and the advocating of peace and justice. I compete for the gospel for the glory of God! WOOHOO! That’s awesome! Take your competitive drive and apply it to THIS! You got some spark? Get passionate for the glory of God!

Neutral Competition: This is the one that’s tricky, but someone said, perhaps there might be a neutral competition that is possible. I agree that just because competition produces a godly end does not mean that it is godly! We hopefully aren’t pragmatic if we’re Christians (although we all tend to be). So just because some abuse brings about events that lead to counseling that leads to a person coming to know Christ, that doesn’t mean that the abuse was godly. God takes all things and uses them for good (Hallelujah!), but what we’re trying to discover is that is competition in and of itself ever godly. We see above that yes it is. So, what about the stuff like sports and Scrabble? It sure is fun! I think that there is a neutral competition where two or more parties agree together that they will engage in a recreational game for a purpose such as building a relationship, getting exercise, or relieving stress (all good things!). This certainly isn’t always explicitly spoken, but using my example of Jeff and I playing cards in bed or my family playing pictionary at Thanksgiving, it is an unspoken agreement that we are playing for the sake of spending time together, and that the goal is relationship rather than selfish gain.

So, since this competition is nuetral, it therefore falls into the category of Romans 14: 14-23 (click to read). Basically, the rule would be the rule of love. Engage in competition as long as you do so out of faith, for the good of you and those around you, and not for selfish motivers. We’re free in that way, but our freedom is not a freedom to please ourselves but to please bless each other. And this is where individual personality/preference/position comes in. Some people are just more comfortable with competition than others. Some are able to easily engage in friendly games without it being selfish or uncomfortable. Others aren’t comfortable with it. Sometimes the difference has to do with our childhood or some experience that has made us more sensitive to it. That’s why we must just understand that it is neutral and that the point is the agreement that we are using competition as a neutral means of acheiving a positive end: relationship, exercise, stress relief (or other). Running a race as a fundraiser for cancer. Meeting up with a friend to run together in the mornings so you can challenge each other to get off the couch and get exercise. Playing Scrabble to engage in relationship (and better your brain!). Working hard in school for the sake of learning as much as you can or for earning scholarships (I’m all about secular scholarships paying for seminary!).

It’s about our Hearts. But here’s the thing, and I just gotta be real honest here. How many of us engage in competition with very pure motives? And even if we do, how often does our flesh get in there and next thing we know we are smiling but inside we have claws and fangs. I don’t feel this way with games, but I get this way with ideas, thoughts, opinions. All of a sudden, when I think I’m having a calm, loving discussion about something, I find this little monster growling inside me and realize my selfish competition, that drive to be right has set in. And I’m a Christian! What is a little scary to me is looking around and realizing what we’ve done with this neutral competition. Take professional sports for example. Neutral competition. A competition taken on by two parties who agree to engage in a sport for the purpose of exercise, stress relief, fun. And now we are crazy. We spend billions of dollars making idols out of people who have a talent for throwing around an orange ball. We value people based not on their status as human beings, but on their ability to win, succeed, achieve. It’s survival of the fittest. I know I’m probably biting off too much here, but will you just think about it with me for a little bit? Think about this competition. Just a few days ago I got my grades from seminary. I never used to pay attention but a few weeks ago I heard someone talking about their classrank. I had forgotten about class rank, but I found myself checking my grades online to see where I ranked. Now why would I do that? Yup. Competition. I recently attended my awesome friend Megan’s graduation who graduated law school with honors. Guess what thought went through my mind? It’d be fun if I graduated with honors at my graduation. What was that? A pure heart that just wants to learn as much as she can in seminary so she can honor God and serve the Lord? Nope. A competitive heart. Yes, it might drive me to excellence, but God doesn’t care about “excellence”, He cares about the heart.

I don’t want to go into specifics but God is challenging Jeff and me in this right now. We’re very eager for a certain situation, and yet we sense God telling us that we should give up our competition for this thing so that another brother may have an opportunity. That is, we sense that in order to compete for justice, godliness, and righteousness, we are to not compete on a human level. Backwards? Yeah. Profitable? Not in the here and now, but I know that nothing feels better than being right with God. We compete for His fame, His glory, His name. (Disclaimer: this is an unsual circumstance. Of course if you are interviewing for a job you greatly desire, do all you can to demonstrate the excellence to qualify for that job. But your goal is excellence and trust in God, not competition against others.)

So, I’m realizing I could write for weeks on this topic. Let’s end here. I know there are some loose ends, but will you just commit with me to think about this? Let’s examine our lives and see the areas where we are selfishly competitive. It’s not that our passion and zeal for competition is wrong, it’s just misplaced. Pleaes don’t hear that if you are a naturally competitive person that that is wrong. Not at all! Praise God for motivated, competitive, passionate people. There the ones who change the world! But let’s ask God to open our eyes to ways that we might let neutral competition become selfish. AnNd let’s engage in Godly Competition for the glory of God, for justice, truth, righteousness, and mercy. Talk about living different! Our entire country is based on celebrating competition. I’d say that’s living different! So the challenge this week is to be a loser. Not that you do poor work or become lazy, but that you are willing to lose something–simply saying “you’re right, I was wrong” or choosing not to strive for vain glory or selfish success, or something as simple as NOT competing with the world but competing for God. Pick 3 areas where you can see subtle (or blatant!) selfish competition, and commit to God to not compete any longer. The things of this world are passing away. Lose your life, compete for something eternal. Fight, strive, train, wrestle, compete for the glory of God. This won’t win you any medals, but you’ll have a joy and satisfaction of knowing that there is nothing you could ever to do add to your worth. It’s only found in Christ.

7 minutes here until class starts again. Here is an article on this very topic (click here to read). Overlook the typos, and I certainly don’t agree with everything in this article, but at least it represents a different mindset (he’s Italian), and I would say some pretty good biblical evidence. Check it out and let me know what you think…I want to give it more study and thought before landing. Throw out some more thoughts to chew on–I’d like more input!

This’ll be short because I want to get your feedback/thoughts. Today in class Dr. Blom was talking about unity in marriage, and he was saying that competition within marriage is deadly. Whenever there is a vying for position, attention, power, the marriage is bound to suffer. His overarching thesis was basically that whatever is prescribed in scripture for relationships is really prescribed in Scripture for marriage, since marriage is the most intimate and important human relationship. Therefore, competition has no place in marriage, because competition is of the flesh. Anytime we are competing to be top, to not lose a fight, to get our own way, to be most important, we are acting out of the flesh.

So, the way my mind works is to take things to the nth degree. If one thing is bad in one situation, I always want to know why it’s not bad in every situation. So, I timidly raised my hand and asked the question: Is competition ever godly, or is it always of the flesh? Dr. Blom smiled (I love him!), and asked me what I thought. I said that it’s obvious that our culture celebrates competition, and there are times when it seems harmless…but is it really? Then I reminded him that he was the seminary professor so I wanted to know what he thought. He was hesitant, but said that he supposed there was a sort of harmless competition, like playing basketball, but that there was certainly some competition seeping into the church that was absolutely deadly: competition over who has the best church, over who has the best worship teams, over proving success within ministry. He even brought up how we might challenge kids to compete in Sunday school about who can memorize the most verses…it has a good outcome, right? So does pragmatism allow fleshly competition to fuel our efforts for godliness?

Now I’m the first one to say that I loved sports growing up and I’m so glad that I played sports. I loved the thrill of competition. Although, strangely enough, I have discovered in the last few years of taking a ridiculous amount of counseling classes 🙂 where I was forced to self-introspection and evaluation, that my competitive drive is mainly focused toward myself. I compete with myself. That’s why I like to run alone. I like to set goals and beat them. I like to compete with myself (maybe because I don’t like to lose!) That’s why my goals in school weren’t to beat anyone, they were to meet some measure that I set for myself. I think it’s also important to note that just because 2 people play a game doesn’t mean they are truly competitive. Jeff and I play cards in bed. I could care less who wins, but it’s fun to play because it brings us together. We play games at holidays as a family. It brings us together. We laugh. We cheer each other on. We make memories. So, all this to say that competition has been the source of a lot of fun and “success” in my life. But is competition itself godly? To be more specific, how is the Kingdom of Heaven advanced and God glorified through competition?

Your turn. Tell me what you think.