I finished writing the little devotional on fear and sent it to Jeff.

“Great,” He replied. “Let’s each write up some discussion questions to go with it.” Super.  I scratched out some thoughts, but before I clicked send his own set of questions popped up in my inbox. His questions were these:

1. Can you think of a time this past year when you were afraid? How did you respond and how did it turn out?

2. How can you see ways that God is delivered you from fear? What is one area where you used to be afraid and now are not?

Fair enough, right? However, my questions were these:

1. What unknown in the future is making you afraid of right now? Is there anything looming ahead that’s causing you anxiety?

2. How can you take that thing and go to God in prayer? What would it look like, practically, to trust Him with your future in this area?

See the difference? So small, yet so profound.

My man is a past-oriented person. I, a future-oriented.

He actually pointed this out to me several months ago. I narrowed my eyes and listened, skeptical. Now I see it everywhere; we’re really ridiculous creatures.

  • He loves to hold onto things. He keeps old clothes, pictures, books. For him they hold memories of the past.
  • I’m a ruthless purger. Haven’t worn it in a year? How about 6-weeks? Close enough. Toss it out. Kids haven’t played with it? Toss it out. Keep moving forward. Make room for new things we’ll inevitably get in the future.
  • He takes pictures. Remember the past.
  • I never take pictures.  Keep moving forward!
  • He never finishes the carton/bottle/box/bag/plate. Leave a little bit in there and keep it in the fridge/cupboard.
  • I drink/eat whatever little bit is left just so I can toss out the container and move on!
  • Jeff keeps receipts for decades.
  • I throw them away as soon as I get home.
  • Jeff loves studying history.
  • I love studying things that motivate me toward a better tomorrow.
  • The kicker? I have a dry-erase calendar on my fridge. I realized that I would erase every single day as soon as it was over, and would start over writing the next month in the blank spaces, so that at all times the calendar was all future dates. No record of what I’d done. Only un-lived days.
  • He doesn’t have a dry-erase calendar because he’d never erase it. 🙂

Do you see? We really are all wired a little differently. Neither is better, but certainly very different. Thankfully, we’re learning from each other. Jeff is learning to throw away the ratty gym shorts and I’m learning to reflect, look back and bit and learn from yesterday before moving onto tomorrow.

And that’s what we need as we cross into 2012. 

Some of us, perhaps, are prone to gaze intently at the future. We’re ready, excited, climbed on board and racing toward another new year. Some of us, on the other hand, want to ride backwards on the train. can we just look behind and remember all the good. Reflect. Review?

We need both. So as we cross the year, perhaps we’d be blessed by setting aside some time for looking both ways? I’m looking forward to doing this tomorrow (haha! I even write with future-oriented language!), with Jeff, as we drive to Corvallis for the day. We’ll be asking ourselves these:

  • What was your greatest victory this past year?
  • What surprised you about the direction of your life this past year?
  • What was harder than you thought it’d be?
  • What was way better than you’d ever imagined?
  • In what way have you changed from January 2011 to December 2011?
and…
  • What are you hoping to see God do in you this year?
  • If you could choose one thing to change about yourself or your habits this year what would it be? 
  • What fruit of the Spirit will you focus on this year?
  • What spiritual discipline (prayer, reading Word, fasting, fellowship, service) would you like to grow in this year?
  • What current relationship would you like to invest in this year?

Just a few ideas to get started. Are you more past-oriented or future oriented in your thinking? I’m curious … Enjoy looking both ways as you cross into 2012, and I pray for God-inspired and God-initiated ideas, dreams, and reflections. {Thanks for reading.}

 

8 thoughts on “Look both ways before crossing the year”

  1. What a fascinating observation! It helps me understand why my youngest child and my hubby are “hoarders” while my other daughters and I are “minimalists”, yet we all have a mix. I’m more sentimental, my hubby is functional, so we approach things with a different mindset.
    I love that God is balance – He constantly urges us to remember (past) and to hope and trust (future) in His covenants and character.

  2. I’m a forward moving sentimentalist. I guess that puts me somewhere in the middle leaning more toward forward motion. Man, I always find myself in the middle. In college, I took a Psychology test to see if I thought more with the right or left side of my brain. I had 26 points for the left side and 24 points for the right side. Hence the reason I call myself a logical dreamer. Sorry I’m rambling. Very interesting post. 🙂

  3. I am afraid I am more like your husband, consider myself a sentimental messy. Very thankful I do that, but it does cause a rift in my ‘throw away husbands’ mind at times. He would pitch it before finding a place to store it. Isn’t it funny how we marry opposites?
    For 38 years we have worked with our differences.

  4. Yes, Nadene I agree–God is the perfect balance. Jeff was reading me Gal 4 last night, examples of how God works at all times in past present and future. Thanks for sharing!

  5. Loved this post! Such a funny reflection of my own marriage! I am a purger; he is a saver. I say sell it at the garage sale; he says he might need it some day. I’d write more, but my white-board needs erasing. 😉 No really. It’s the 30th and there’s nothing going on tomorrow, so I’m erasing and cleaning it tonight!

  6. I love the name of this post! I’ve been thinking about it for days. I tried to comment at first but I couldn’t really make sense so I gave up. I am such a future-oriented person, and as best as I can figure it, Dan is totally even and both. He is very analytical, so I think that makes him look back more (I have nicknamed him Mr. Hash and re-hash). I think I learn from the past intuitively, but I don’t really like to talk about it that much 🙂 Just forget it and move on. But he loves to discuss the past in great detail. He also has so much vision and loves to plan and build, so he’s future-oriented too. But he’s the one with the huge box of college sweatshirts in the basement 🙂 Anyway, that’s probably more than you wanted to know.. but thanks.. it was fun to think about!

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