This week I witnessed an extraordinary example of community, the power of sisters gathering–in honesty, humility, confession, accountability, and prayer. It reminded me of this from a few years ago, when I was so lonely here inside my head. May you take that first scary step toward vulnerability and transparency, and may you discover again the power of together

~

It’s lonely here, inside my head.

Every thought just echoes in the emptiness, returning back to me over and over again. Except, unlike an echo, the reverberations keep getting louder and louder, instead of fading away.

What started it? Maybe social media. Photos of everyone else having fun (without me), and feeling left out. The random interaction that mysteriously threw me for a loop. Or a comment from a friend, not meant to hurt, that hurt nonetheless. Or measuring my worth by some impossible scale. Or some public mishap with the children. It’s all clear evidence which seals the verdict:

Guilty of first degree failure.

They say women are complicated. We must be, because sometimes I don’t even know what’s wrong as a tear slides down my cheek.

But I know it’s lonely in my head when I’m the only one talking.

And there’s no one in there to interrupt those echoes. Those accusations and hopeless lines and blanket statements. A few of us are fortunate enough to have close–really close–friends who we can call or text, a few words shared can sometimes ease the load immensely.

If we let someone else into our head it’s not so lonely anymore. 

The echoes stop.

It’s as simple as a text. A one-line email. A 30-second call:

“I’m getting beat down. Will you pray?”

That’s all. Nine times out of ten the reason I don’t reach out is that a) I don’t know exactly what’s bothering me and b) I don’t really want to talk about it. I hate hashing things out because I’m not a verbal processor (but that’s great if you are!).

A one-line call for help says:

I don’t need to talk about it. I just want you to know about it.

And as great as that one-line call for help is, it works best on conjunction with another one-line call:

The one that goes straight to Jesus.

“I’m getting beat down. Will you pray?”

And He ever lives to make intercession for us.

Consequently, he is able to save to the uttermost those who draw near to God through him, since he always lives to make intercession for them. (Heb. 7:25)

Not just in the past. Right now:

“Who is to condemn? Christ Jesus is the one who died–more than that, who was raised–who is is at the right hand of God, who indeed is interceding for us.” (Rom. 8:34)

In an instant He can silence the echoes. He can fill the emptiness. He can take away the loneliness, there inside your head.

{Do you need to text these 7 words to someone today? “I’m getting beat down. Will you pray?” Or write them here, in the comments, and it would be my joy to pray for you today. Thank you so much for reading.}

27 thoughts on “When you’re lonely, there inside your head.”

  1. I had been feeling beaten down Sunday. It was nagging me this thing beating me down. Feeling…alone, leftover, left out. I did remember to turn to Him and ask, why? Help me. He did of course. For me it was a twofold answer. I know. I love you. I have you where I want you and a CA. Corrective Action. This CA required me humbling myself, repenting AND rejoicing! Yes, the echoes of my self, and a lie. Silenced by THE ONE high above all things, calling me back.
    “Prone to wander, Lord, I feel it—
    Prone to leave the God I love;
    Here’s my heart, O take and seal it,
    Seal it for Thy courts above.”

    1. Love it. Amen. The temptation to self-pity, always always always always there. So proud of you for your response! Next time let me pray for you, though! 🙂 Love you.

    1. YES!! Was JUST thinking of you this morning because I made your contact-info note my Bible bookmark. I think of you every single day. 😉

  2. Being in leadership with my husband in our ministry has been extra hard as of late….hubby just spent 2 weeks in India and then two days later flew out to CA for a week long conference. I’ve struggled a bit more lately because it seems that people are praying like crazy for him, but my boys and I desperately need the prayers as well. No doubt, I imagine I’m simply unaware of other’s prayers, but have been more discouraged the last few days. Am grabbing hold of Jesus, which is the best place to be…the selfish side just wishes someone would call and see how I’m doing. I honestly thought I was over this since my hubby has been traveling for the past 19 years….but the battle is most definitely more intense than I remember it being, and so it seems that the prayers are more necessary than ever. (thanks for reading..and praying 🙂

    1. Oh girl, yeah–alone in head and alone in reality! Praying for you right now! Thank you so much for sharing, and for traveling this road with me. Bless you!

  3. Yes! I’m an internal processor so nothing is evident until I have reached a conclusion. There is a lot of hidden wrestling especially in the wee hours of the morning. This is the time that I meditate on the Word: Your Word is a lamp for my feet and lights my path. Reaching out to a Sister for prayer support is a novel idea! I’ll text before I go to bed so I don’t scare them with a 2 am plea for prayer! Thanks, Kari!

  4. Just what I needed to hear. Thank you for sharing 🙂 I needed that encouragement.

  5. I’ve been battling loneliness so much this week. Your blog was PERFECT timing for me to read this evening. So nice to know I’m not the only one that feels down and discouraged for no obvious reason. I could definitely use some prayer, and I would be honored if you’d send one up for me, Kari. I will pray for you too, Sister!

    1. Ahhh! So happy to see your name here, Carolina. Oh my, it’s been so long. Definitely praying for you tonight–thank you so much for letting me! Love you and bless you girl!!

  6. In the chaos of having three children stay the night with my three children, I’m finding rest and quitness. I’m praying for you this morning my friend.

  7. I like your idea but I think we need to cultivate some people who would understand what we mean when we send that text so they do not call us and pepper us with questions meaning well I am sure.

    We have to learn to extend our hand without knowing what we are pulling someone out of.

  8. Okay that story about Dutch made my day! He is so sweet and I love his innocent response:) Marshall would probably do the exact same thing!! Loved the rest of the post as well, such a great reminder to be the one to let people know how they can pray for you instead of expecting others to ‘just know’.
    Hope you guys are well, looking forward to connecting again at some point:)

    1. Shannon, Thank you for asking! I just prayed for you and will continue. I pray the enemy’s lies are exposed and brought to the light and God would give you the power to SIDE WITH HIM and keep fighting the spiritual battle of faith. Bless you dear sister, you are doing wonderful work for the gospel! Thank you again for asking; I’ll keep praying.

  9. I am too. Please pray for me. God uses your posts so many times in my life. Thanks, Kari.

Comments are closed.

Share This